I cannot tell you how many times I hear horror stories about what is going on within marriages. At least one of
Grace versus Law
Illustration by Heather Darling
the partners wants to leave the marriage as he/she does not feel safe, honored or valued. It is not unusual to learn that the partners have been separated for years; yet, do not divorce (that is do not do the paperwork although living as divorced) because they have the perception that “divorce is a sin.” Granted sin may be in the marriage and leads couples to divorce, but the divorce is not the sin. (Without taking time to go into that discussion, I ask you to read the category on my website under “Reasons for Divorce.”)
So often, these people are attending wonderful churches which preach the wonderful gift of grace. Nevertheless, these folks are still living under the law. Why?
Max Lucado says, “What is grace? It’s what someone gives us out of the goodness of his (Christ’s) heart, not out of the perfection of ours. In God’s plan, you’re not trying to keep a legalistic system, you’re responding to a system of love and peace.” (The Inspirational Study Bible: Life Lessons from the Inspired Word of God, “Grace”, Dallas: Word Publishing, 1995, 241)
If these folks know that they will never return to the marriage, why do they not complete the formalities, or the paperwork? Do they think they are fooling God; that He is less saddened by their current arrangement if the paperwork is not done? He spoke of this to Moses and told Moses to tell the men to write documents of divorce to free their wives if they were not going to live by the standards of loving husbands.
Could it be that living under the law is “laziness”? Does it take less effort on the person to just accept law versus studying and accepting grace? Is it mindless obedience that requires no personal spiritual growth or mature decsions? Grace requires time to get to know God and His son. It puts a bit of a responsibility on individuals to establish a relationship with the “Trinity” and hear Godly direction from the Holy Spirit and Scriptures instead of accepting the religious legal lists mentioned under old covenants in the Old Testament.
Laziness comes in the form of hearing the priest, pastor or religious people deliver their ideas and perceptions of how your “religion” should look and how you should behave versus growing up spiritually and conducting conversations with your Heavenly Father through the leading of the Holy Spirit. God gave you a mind and a heart. Use them to get to know your loving Father. Think about it and conduct yourself as God leads you; not others.