Coping with Divorce

Coping with divorce “…is a choice…and you must face it, embrace it, and give it over to our Maker, who wants to make you well…[but] many will try taking shortcuts.  They will try to stay busy…or look for a replacement spouse.  Unfortunately, most of these people will find themselves right back where they started if they do not work on inward healing.”  You can choose to stay stuck in a pity party or strive to become a better, not bitter child of the King..

Transferring pain by a “fix” that covers it up will never work long term.  It will present itself again in the future if it is not handled and removed.

God promises that “all things work together for good to those who love Him,” but He expects us to do some leg work.

One can hold on to that promise or shut down into a self-absorbed life of believing that his/her spouse was life itself.  This is idolatry; suggesting a spouse has more to offer than God’s promises.

…”These people have selfishly decided to hold on to the negative emotions, perhaps because by doing so it continued to link them to the past they were not ready to leave behind; or even worse, they have identified with being a victim and find some form of satisfaction within this status….Love does not encourage someone to hold on to the pain of their past..”

“Each chapter of our lives can strengthen us for the next one if we take time to learn the lessons.  If not, we live a life of continual stagnating crises.”

Coping with divorce has some plusses as, “troubles present a great contrast to joy by allowing us to see God in action.”

“Trust God …knowing that what appears to be hard today may be a blessing tomorrow.  Instead of using your energy to fret, worry, and wonder what is going on, work on keeping your daily routine as stable and productive as possible.”

“Later in my healing, one of the greatest burdens I felt lifted from me was when I realized it was okay to continue to love my former husband…Continuing to love someone is fine.  I can still love him without being “in love” with him.”

Remember, “Your integrity and the way you act and react will be important to you in the future.”

excerpts from my blog

Posts on Divorce

 

Divorce

Divorce in the Pool

Every week I get several calls from persons whose partners have chosen to leave them. Upon asking the details there is usually a lot of confusion regarding why the partners would choose to leave or blaming the partners for leaving. If this thinking has gone on for...

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Divorce in the Pool
Divorce

Pastor Greg Boyd Comments on Divorce

  The right to divorce is still a very troublesome subject for many. Very few pastors are willing to approach the subject via the pulpit. Pastor Greg Boyd of Woodland Hills Church in St Paul, MN has been one gracious exception. I have paraphrased one of his...

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Pastor Greg Boyd Comments on Divorce

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